Can I Really Change?


“Yes!  I do have that many emails.  You read correctly– 6,149.”  My blood starting boiling about the same temperature as the steaming iron I was holding in my hand.

My husband was grinning and picking on me in a light hearted way, but inside I was feeling heavier than light hearted.  I was feeling like a dense, sinking failure. I was thinking, “how can you expect to keep up with anything if you have thousands of emails and a computer that has so many files on it, it could crash at any moment?” I let my mind go places that no one walking in newness of life should be hanging out.  In a place spiritually that felt dark, hopeless for change…stuck.


I just wanted to say:

I’m never going to change.

I can’t.  This is who I am.

But this is a LIE.  And I just know someone else needs to hear this.  Someone else is believing lies that they can never be transformed by the power of the Holy Spirit.

In John 3, Nicodemus came to Jesus in the dark of night, ready to profess that he believed Jesus was the one they had been waiting for.  This is what Jesus said to him:

“I tell you the truth, unless you are born again, you cannot see the Kingdom of God.”

Nicodemus was so puzzled.  How can a grown man (or woman 🙂 be born again?  Jesus said,

“The Holy Spirit gives NEW LIFE from heaven.”

How do we walk in dark situations like we can see the light of new life peeking through?  How can I stay the old me and walk forward with Jesus?

The answer is that every moment you are living a surrendered life to Jesus, his Spirit inside of you is transforming you.  From beauty to new beauty.  From old self to new you in Christ. Sometimes it will be awkward or painful, but it should always be



“For I am about to do something NEW. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.”  Isaiah 43:19

New. Brand spanking new.  I can just smell a new baby smell.  A new car smell.  A new book smell.

I can see new.  I can see my mailbox with a number like 5.  Maybe 10.:)

Picture where you need to Believe He can make”NEW.”

<<<<<Now, here’s a few steps to get there>>>>>

1.Know he sees you right there, and he loves you perfectly, right there.

2.  Believe he wants to transform you into a new person instead of conforming to the old.

3. Trust only in His power and help to change, not in your own.

4.  Hear hope instead of condemnation.

Last year spring, my daughters and I visited a butterfly farm and marveled at the hundreds of beautifully fluttering wings all around us.  When they showed her the cocoons, my daughter couldn’t believe that something so beautiful came out of something so plain.  She didn’t see any intricate design or bright colors on the outside.  But inside, the creatures were being transformed, into something even more beautiful than what they once were.

It’s the same with what God does in us.  If we allow him to, we can have new life in every bleak and dark situation. Because He is our God. And through his Spirit he makes all things new.

Even an email account gone completely unruly! (If you want to contact me, I will see and respond, no worries, I just have problems with the delete button 😉


Walk with Life Himself into new life today!

*This post correlates with Alive! Book of John Study.  See link below for details:

Here’s my Write It Out:


Here’s my AlIVE Journal page:


2 thoughts on “Can I Really Change?

  1. Amy. Your blog is so helpful to me. I’m in a holding pattern. I’m waiting on God to direct me because if I make decisions myself I always make the wrong ones. Thank you for this blog it’s helping. Your friend. Gina Castleberry


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